View Full Version : Go balling with the ballingest ballerina to ever ball
http://i38.tinypic.com/2qtk188.gif
I'm looking for a special applicant--a SINGLE person to transform from pub to team carrier. Requirements:
$ Non-EM, non-leaver status.
$ 1600+ PSR under the new system.
$ Highly proficient in English.
$ Willingness to take a ton of trashtalking.
$ Willingness to learn quickly.
$ Confident and sexy.
Applicant will learn several HoN skills, including but not limited to:
$ Stat farming a tryhard opponent after you beat him senselessly.
$ Ragequitting if you don't get mid solo after calling it.
$ Saying "pce" or "u ok?" after killing someone.
If you're interested, reply with your in-game name. Do not attempt to contact me in-game on Nome--I never play on that name. Read the full thread before replying--plenty of information is dispersed throughout the replies. This is not a joke--this will be real, intensive training.
$$$ If you don't have the balls to ball with me, don't apply, baller $$$
http://i33.tinypic.com/rk7n1g.gif
Magissia
10-25-2009, 05:23 PM
Hai teacher
My name is Magissia !
Smells like a trap.
feels like a trap.
VyyyE
10-25-2009, 05:27 PM
I'd be up for it. None of the rules are an issue and really wanting to learn to play better. Preferably want to get into the competitive scene sooner or later, and this would speed up the process.
In game name : VyyyE.
Magissia
10-25-2009, 05:27 PM
Smells like a trap.
feels like a trap.
I'll check it
Let me reiterate, this is a serious request.
This will be intensive. I will rage hard at you until you start doing things right, and if you fail to do things right after once or twice, I will dump you and grab another applicant. The applicant will be considered a success once he reaches 1750 PSR under the new system (comparable to 2000 PSR in the old system).
Norroar
10-25-2009, 05:31 PM
Hello Nome.
My account name is Norroar, and I have had quite some troubles playing Heroes of Newerth - because apparently all the tryhards are winning against me.
I've got above 1500 PSR, but I do not believe that quite reflect my actual skill level. I'm willing to learn, and you can give me all the constructive feedback you want to! I can use microphone if needed, and send pics to prove how sexy I am. If you are looking for a cute boyfriend, please pm me!
Favorite hero: Moon Queen (I play it a lot. Sometimes my ultimate doesn't seem to do damage, do you know why? Asked forums, but they just flamed me.)
Favorite level: 6. I like level 6 a lot, because then I can get my super spell.
Favorite music: I like good country music and jazz. If you want to, we could share music interests! I'd love to get to know some new bands.
Favorite food: Hotdogs are definitely my favorite food, no doubt on that! I could eat lots of them right now. Om nom nom.
Favorite animal: Turtles. They are so cute!
If there's anything else you need to know, just whisper me in the game! Hugs & kiss'!
(Pfft! I'm above 1750, but plx teach me anyway!)
It looks like the pitch for a reality TV program, which makes it smell like a trap.
Are you gonna be posting updates of your trainee's progress or something? Could be entertaining for the rabble. :P
EDIT: Screw it, I'll apply to.
Name: Harakoni
Yes, I will be updating with trainee progress.
Games will consist of 1600+/1700+ serious business tryhard games only. Applicant will be playing with me and one or two [myu] clanmates (probaly [myu]pandaroohoo and [myu]Tifa2). My intent is to be able to whip the applicant into proplayer shape within 10 games of screaming and raging.
Norroar
10-25-2009, 05:39 PM
I'd like you to boost my skills! Srsly.
VyyyE
10-25-2009, 05:40 PM
How will you decide who gets picked?
By joining their games on a smurf and looking at how much potential they have.
archkyle
10-25-2009, 05:43 PM
im up for anything! sign me up
Norroar
10-25-2009, 05:43 PM
You seem to ignore me!
Magissia
10-25-2009, 05:44 PM
Rage on me Nome, when will we start ?
Oh, just noticed you edited to 1600+ PSR under the new system as a requirement, in that case you'd need to look at my alternate account, Harakoni.
More like you will rage on him.
Satyrael
10-25-2009, 05:55 PM
Archael7
become_death
10-25-2009, 06:42 PM
Archael7
Simple. To the point. No frills. I think this is the guy for the job, Nome.
I'm sexier than that Archael7 queer 2 posts ago. :|
become_death
10-25-2009, 06:58 PM
I'm sexier than that Archael7 queer 2 posts ago. :|
If you're a chick irl then we obviously need pix to prove it.
If you're a chick irl then we obviously need pix to prove it.
No. I'm as manly as man can be, and you can just take my word for it :cool:
King_Fear
10-25-2009, 07:03 PM
You should totally teach me first. Aren't we friends? :(
JewishNinja
10-25-2009, 07:05 PM
sup, i want in
Tripwyr
10-25-2009, 07:09 PM
If you're serious, I've really wanted to start playing carry more. No more relying on other people to get the job done.
I'm 1600-1650 under the new system, was 1780(?) before the compression. Only played support before, tired of playing assist *****.
Tripwyr
EDIT: Don't try to contact me in-game, I'll more than likely be AFK.
Kennedy
10-25-2009, 07:17 PM
I am not 1600 on the new system, but I am certainly interested.
I am not 1600 on the new system, but I am certainly interested.
Don't listen to this kid. He doesn't measure up to me. I am by far the best noob here.
Vodka
10-25-2009, 08:03 PM
HankyPanky. Looking forward to the raging.
I was 1600 until I started losing :(
Well_Shebber
10-25-2009, 08:24 PM
Obvious sarcasm is... apparently not obvious, according to the replies here.
Elzaros
10-25-2009, 08:25 PM
Elzaros (stats/psr are ****ed after patch. but hey, thought i'd give it a shot.)
Obvious sarcasm is... apparently not obvious, according to the replies here.
When you're dealing with me, it's not "sarcasm", it's "orgasm". RNT I FUNNY?
Obvious sarcasm is... apparently not obvious, according to the replies here.
I'm actually quite serious about everything in the OP.
Tripwyr
10-25-2009, 08:45 PM
In that case, ignore my post because I just wanted to keep this thread going. It was hilarious.
IPlayForKeep
10-25-2009, 08:52 PM
lol at trip
Tripwyr
10-25-2009, 09:28 PM
lol at trip
Get out-KS'd by demented shaman.
Sheapy1
10-25-2009, 09:39 PM
I'd be willing to sign up for a go if you don't find the perfect person from the previous applicants
IGN: Sheapy
I wanna tango, baby.
http://i38.tinypic.com/35l7maf.jpg
archkyle
10-25-2009, 09:52 PM
I wanna tango, baby.
http://i38.tinypic.com/35l7maf.jpg
kraken looks TOO happy...
nome you smell like trash
i'll fight you at lan
IPlayForKeep
10-25-2009, 09:53 PM
Get out-KS'd by demented shaman.
Wasn't me was panda n00b
http://i38.tinypic.com/2dqpts9.jpg
Volshok
10-25-2009, 11:43 PM
Well this thread got out of hand fast.
Au contraire mon ami, it is right on target.
Kennedy
10-26-2009, 12:03 AM
pick me pick me pick me!
Volshok
10-26-2009, 12:50 AM
Au contraire mon ami, it is right on target.
You can't be Gangster and French at the same time.
Desirable
10-26-2009, 01:04 AM
Desi needs you Nome.
AdamaA
10-26-2009, 01:19 AM
If I were 1600+ i would try, i'm a tryhard.
You can't be Gangster and French at the same time.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZrhwNyaVv0
That's about as "hard" as making death threats with a baguette.
Cpt_Shadow
10-26-2009, 05:10 AM
cpt_shadow i wanna learn so i'll sign up as well
Trysaeder
10-26-2009, 05:23 AM
Trysaeder, I need to master the art of carrying 1-3 pub teams.
Lolololage
10-26-2009, 08:03 AM
Im up for this totally.
I consider myself a fairly good team player, and i know the basics of the game, while i cannot play all heroes, i can play a decent range.
Ive got zero DOTA experiance, and about 200 games of hon played.
Scottish born (if you consider that good enough "English")
Volshok
10-26-2009, 11:14 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZrhwNyaVv0
I think Athene could have been a better response. Besides, having Chabal play for France doesn't make up for a lifetime of disappointment.
TreeHorse
10-26-2009, 12:29 PM
Nome - I would like to play a game.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/1/10/Billypuppet.jpg
You should be aware that I will rage harder, longer, and more enthusiastically than you will.
ShadowsCrush
10-26-2009, 12:51 PM
serious or not, this thread is lawls
Newerth
10-26-2009, 01:08 PM
ME ME ME
My PSR under new system is like 1750+ but only cuz I get carried every game. My true PSR is actually more like ~1100 would really like to learn. I can take flames like a champ.
AdamaA
10-26-2009, 01:11 PM
Please, fraps some of these ballings, with voice. For the lols or the learns.
Volshok
10-26-2009, 01:13 PM
My real hope is that when Nome tests these people he smurfs their games as a solo mid boots first Chronos and yells at them the entire game.
Tripwyr
10-26-2009, 03:06 PM
My real hope is that when Nome tests these people he smurfs their games as a solo mid boots first Chronos and yells at them the entire game.
rofl.
Solo mid or I feed
Volshok
10-26-2009, 05:14 PM
rofl.
Solo mid or I feed
That's the only English he is allowed to use, for everything else he has to rage in Swahili or another language with a small speaking audience, and chain ping random parts of the map.
That's the only English he is allowed to use, for everything else he has to rage in Swahili or another language with a small speaking audience, and chain ping random parts of the map.
No, he has to speak Portuguese only, in the mic, and never shut up even after he realizes that nobody else in the game is Brazilian.
Viole
10-26-2009, 06:39 PM
not a trap
i was instructed under this system
TreeHorse
10-26-2009, 06:47 PM
not a trap
i was instructed under this system
I dunno...I saw some pretty scrub Magmus play by Nome :rolleyes:
Viole
10-26-2009, 06:57 PM
I dunno...I saw some pretty scrub Magmus play by Nome :rolleyes:
mind games bro
TreeHorse
10-26-2009, 06:58 PM
mind games bro
I'm not'cha bro, brah.
CrunkOwns
10-26-2009, 07:13 PM
PICK ME
Name: CrunkOwns
I never played DOTA but have played a lot of HoN and am starting to dominate pub games at all times. I've been a top 10 command and conquer player for a couple years and have a ton of RTS experience. I've got some sick micro and with a coach I think I will carry all teams and make the current pro teams feel like scrubs. Havn't played on the reset yet but before reset i was 2200 kills, 1200 deaths , and 3600 assists with 1700 PSR. I'll get 1600 tonight so I can fit ur req's. Hit me up!
Skype = Crunk 8D
MSN = Crunk8D@live.com
ShadowsCrush
10-26-2009, 07:56 PM
PICK ME
Name: CrunkOwns
I never played DOTA but have played a lot of HoN and am starting to dominate pub games at all times. I've been a top 10 command and conquer player for a couple years and have a ton of RTS experience. I've got some sick micro and with a coach I think I will carry all teams and make the current pro teams feel like scrubs. Havn't played on the reset yet but before reset i was 2200 kills, 1200 deaths , and 3600 assists with 1700 PSR. I'll get 1600 tonight so I can fit ur req's. Hit me up!
Skype = Crunk 8D
MSN = Crunk8D@live.com
this man has the attitude! pick him!
Volshok
10-26-2009, 08:42 PM
Sounds like he might just wanna FLIP THAT ENERGY AND JUMP INTO A 180 BABY, YEAH BOIIII. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FppsIoJsHOs&feature=related)
I highly recommend this for anyone who wants to step up and play games at the highest level to get that paycheck.
become_death
10-26-2009, 10:07 PM
i cant believe i just missed reply # 69
DAMN YOU JACK DANIELS
Shadowcamsy
10-27-2009, 12:39 AM
Oh hells yeah, I'd love to go ballin' with Nome... I mean... err... =_=
ShadowsCrush
10-27-2009, 12:40 AM
Sounds like he might just wanna FLIP THAT ENERGY AND JUMP INTO A 180 BABY, YEAH BOIIII. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FppsIoJsHOs&feature=related)
I highly recommend this for anyone who wants to step up and play games at the highest level to get that paycheck.
Fruit Punch NOS > all
Zolfix
10-27-2009, 10:32 AM
I would be interested, but I doubt I will need help reaching 1750. I should be there in about 1.5-2 weeks on my own. I imagine I will level off around there though so I would love to learn something and go higher than that.
Azgalor
10-27-2009, 11:14 AM
sounds hot and hard
Vodka
10-27-2009, 11:24 AM
So have your smurfed any of my games yet?
TreeHorse
10-27-2009, 12:56 PM
Nome is too busy furiously 1v1ing himself IRL to post in this thread.
Listen *****, I'm not going to sit there and just listen to your mindless trash talking. Instead, I plan on dishing out some trash talk of my own. So please STFU and let me solo mid.
Volshok
10-27-2009, 01:14 PM
So have your smurfed any of my games yet?
I asked him and he just looked at me with sad eyes and silently nodded his head yes. Looks like you should have flipped your energy with a 180 so you could win games at the highest level.
usaltylulz
10-27-2009, 06:33 PM
I'll apply just to teach you how to solo mid Arachna.
Kennedy
10-27-2009, 09:42 PM
I'm 1600 now if you wanna consider me <3
Ph3noM1
10-27-2009, 09:47 PM
Ph3noM
Ghizz
10-28-2009, 07:40 AM
1500s carry me plz
Sagat
10-28-2009, 10:04 AM
What's my PSR?
edit: 1629. Oh baby; I'm fratey. What's not to love?
Teroril
10-28-2009, 03:45 PM
I'm up for it.. I need to learn to farm better with carries anyway :<
Though my psr swings between 1500 and 1600 at the moment.
Glorify1
10-28-2009, 05:29 PM
You teach me Nome?
Lim_Dul
10-28-2009, 07:17 PM
You teach me Nome?
But you suck, Angel! There's no hope for you! :-P
P.S. I love your FPVoD Videos - especially after you started adding recorded team chat. :-D
I will be 1600 any minute (used to be 1700+ for a while before the stats reset), have around 400 games played at this point and no DotA experience.
I am interested in learning something new and love being trash talked to. ^^
I am usually rolling with my American EX-DotA buddies, so got the basics of non-pub teamwork down as well. We hang out on Ventrilo, hence I'm no stranger to voice communication either.
My English skills are excellent when it comes to writing (if I dare say so myself) since I'm a translator and slightly worse when it comes to spoken language (http://www.youtube.com/user/limdul for reference videos ;-).
I'm from Europe but have no problems with US Servers as long as they are on the East Coast. Also, I have no problems with timezone differences since my job provides me with flexible working hours resulting in staying up till like 4 a.m. on a regular basis (mostly to catch up with procrastinated commissions ;-).
Am I bad-ass enough to roll with you? YOU DECIDE!
http://i.imagehost.org/0962/IMG_1132.jpg
My in-game name is the one you see on the forums.
TreeHorse
10-28-2009, 07:18 PM
I'm starting to think Nome did this just to **** with us.
Elzaros
10-28-2009, 07:32 PM
I'm starting to think Nome did this just to **** with us.
Orly?
TreeHorse
10-28-2009, 07:38 PM
Orly?
:<
I really wanted a rage competition. owellz
Kharg
10-29-2009, 04:53 AM
ill rage with you TreeHorse! <3
ruskor
10-29-2009, 08:06 AM
$ Saying "pce" or "u ok?" after killing someone.
i prefer: "U MAD??"
Glorify1
10-29-2009, 10:36 AM
i prefer: "U MAD??"
Proper response is PZ.
HONYoda
10-29-2009, 10:41 AM
You don't want me, because I rage way harder than you and I guarandamntee that I'm even louder than you in dah voicechat. I'm always a strong player, never a feeder. I was so pro in the DOTA that I couldn't fill games once the other team noticed mah namez. I think I'm too gud for ur teamz. :)
Mellow
10-29-2009, 10:57 AM
1600+, no dota experience, about 500 HoN games. I'm solid support but I'm bad at carrying on my own, thus I lose most pub games